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Subject: Traditional Metal Purist?
Replies: 11 Views: 1385
mielikki 9.08.09 - 05:27am
You claim to be open-minded because you listen to Kiss, ACDC, Guns N Roses or any other non-metal rock band
How can anyone listen to non-metal?
Non-metal is gay, except for the stuff you listen to to re-assure yourself that youre open-minded
The only black metal band you listen to is Venom
Anything with the word Core is emo cr*p
You complain about gimmicks in metal and not having a gimmick is a gimmick in itself
You get offended by drum machines
Theres nothing metal at all about metalcore. Therefore it is inferior music
You say Stay Metal or Metalhead For Life to fellow Motorhead and Iron Maiden fans
Opeth is generic melodic death but theyre too experimental for you because of their acoustic guitars
You b*tch about how Opeths d*mnation alb*m failed to be metal,even though the band made it as an experimental progressive rock alb*m for fun
Black Label Society actually doesnt bore you
Solos are your favourite parts of a song
You refuse to listen to anything that doesnt have an electric guitar
There is nothing gay about Judas Priest!
You could see yourself listening to Repulsion and say theyre one of the grind bands, although you dont listen to them, but say you like them to appear as if youre open to some grindcore
Saying metal is superior is not an opinion but a fact and your evidence is a Black Sabbath alb*m
Lemmy is God, end of discussion
Anything too fast is noisecore. Noisecore is
Killswitch Engage is a guilty pleasure
You b*tch about music that has ty riffs
Metalcore is not music!
Commercial glam rock is more respectable than underground hip-hop
You actually buy that collectors edition box set of old 80s bands because theres nothing else to buy in this age of dead music. Its the same thing repackaged people!
Youve been talking about how metal has been dying over the years
A song lasting more than 10 minutes is unbearable
It has a few good riffs but the rest is is something you say about albums you think had potential but failed because they were too modern
And Justice For All.... was Metallicas downfall, yet you still own everything after that
Liking Thrash crossover shows you are eclectic
You still b*tch about Metallica as if nobody else could see how ty they are now except you
Morbid Angel is grindcore nonsense
Grindcore is noisecore, therefore grindcore is
All core sounds the same
Converge and Korn play the same type of don't they?
Breakdowns are annoying *
mielikki 9.08.09 - 05:31am
Metal is life and life is metal. Live for metal and metal will live for you is a philosophy you take seriously
Youll b*tch about how all core sounds the same as you listen to some generic heavy metal band
You had a hard time admitting punk influenced some metal, but you accept it now because you say metalcore is horrible
You think emo and nu-metal are the same thing
Meshuggah is noisecore
Fast drums pi*s you off
Industrial metal? How dare you!
Inserting clean vocals in death metal is too experimental
Death metal is good only if its death thrash, not death grind
Everyone is stupid for not listening to metal
Dream Theater are not that bad
Keyboards must die if theyre being unpredictable
Progressive Metal is pretty good as long as its not Opeth or has too much jazz
Strapping Young Lad is death metal, not thrash
Brutal Death Metal? More like noisecore
Where are the riffs? The RIFFS!
Speed Metal rules because its fast but grindcore s*cks because its fast
Black Sabbath and Cathedral rule because theyre slow but Opeth blow because theyre slow
Youre an intellectual for listening to metal
Avant-garde is music?
NWOBHM bands are the most talented and skilled bands
Morbid Angel is metalcore now
You appreciate Power Metal the same way you appreciate classical
Mathcore is horrible no-talent nonsense
You dont really like black metal but insist nu-metal s listen to black metal instead, and when they do pick up on black metal, you b*tch about whatever band they listen to are not true enough because Mayhem is mallcore now
Death sold out
Long hair makes a difference
Melodic Death does not have any thrash qualities
Metal doesnt s*ck. You do!
There's no such thing as talented guitarists in metalcore *
mielikki 9.08.09 - 05:32am
Fine...Chimaira is metal but they still s*ck
King Diamond is the most creative band you like
Anyone want to trade tapes?
Jokes about Lemmy's face are a goldmine only real metalheads can find funny
You like Gwar for their music, but only sometimes
Cannibal Corpse is goregrind
Whatever happened to the days of good metal? you ask yourself everyday
What?! Thats not metal!
Whoever fuses jazz with metal again dies
You remember the line-up history for all your favourite bands
You'll whine about how metal needs to be accepted by the mainstream but if it ever does get big it's because it's false metal by default
The Misfits are too popular to have influenced anyone
You feel let down by your favourite bands when they say they were influenced by something you hate aka non-metal
You say technical skills dont matter but hate metalcore and nu-metal cause its not technical enough
New bands would be decent if they played thrash and named themselves Slayer and murdered Slayer, then looked like them and then took over their identities. Its the only way a new band can be tolerated
Im NOT Satanic so I have no problem with Satanic lyrics
Im NOT Christian but I have a problem with Christian lyrics
Metalhead is a word you use often
Goregrind has more in common with Romantic Comedies than metal
How can anything new be good?
You never heard a real gothic metal band but you still hate gothic metal anyways
Neurosis would be okay if they took out the intolerable original vocals and experimentation
Alice in Chains is grunge, not metal
You're ambivalent towards black metal
Grunge/Nu-metal/Rap/Somethingcore /Pop/or/Whatever-is-popular-at-the-moment killed metal
You still say Long live metal even though just a minute ago you were yammering on about how metal is dead and everything will always remain hopeless because the kids just don't get it
Metalcore is an oxymoron
Youd listen to Probot if it didnt have Dave Grohl
You b*tch about how kids need to listen to Manowar to hear some real metal. Then when they say power metal is hmo-erotic, your only defense is Well they can play guitar dumbass, that's real metal
If you find yourself liking a punk band, they must be a crossover band.....yeah that explains it!
This list is stupid and you posted it at some forum to mock it *
borae 9.08.09 - 06:02am
tidy *
hfb 9.08.09 - 09:02am
I actually like the probot album,the judas priest comment is a belter though *
mielikki 9.08.09 - 09:05am
The Judas Priest one is my favourite *
andy_666 9.08.09 - 09:50am
thats a good read *
darkxn 17.06.10 - 07:21am
Brilliant...! :D And, yes - there is NOTHING gay about Judas Priest!!! xD *
hfb 17.06.10 - 10:40am
i grew up on tape trading in the late eighties to early nineties *
lucretia 19.06.10 - 12:36am
lmao!! gotta love it! :D hahahaha *
byakko 22.06.10 - 08:27pm
Sad thing is I actually know people like that :/ But if they insult converge,they shall pay *
rav3n 29.10.10 - 04:52am
nice but morbid angel aint s**t *